Wassup Jackass...Well, well, well, wat can i say...Been very kecoh or busy recently with projects and school stuffs. Felt very frustrated, stressed and fucked up. Sori lah geng especially
for those who saw me with a glum, sick face, moody or watever kanina face when I'm in school. It's not that my body is sick, but mentally YES. Its' all because of projects with
PROGRAMMING stuffs in it. Felt helpess and useless team member I can say. Sometimes I just wonder siol, y I cant simply at least know the basic programming things. Database subject
all I can say is MATI TENTU MATI ( die sure die). It all began with the labtest. Im not afraid to tell u guys, I simply cant even create tables with those Primary Keys and Foreign Keys.
Confirm one, out of 100, sure I get below 10. Yeah yeah laugh lah. Im just really fucking mad at myself dat day. Panic? Its not a good reason. The teacher told us if we involved in the
project, confirm labtest no prob for sure. I really don't know, hearing that makes me like I'm useless team member who doesnt deserved to be in a good team. Simple questions also cannot
answer. I tried to be involved but seeing those gd guys doing the codings, I felt really low. Credits should be given to them instead and not me. For Advanced Mobile Computing, I simply
heck care. Yes even if I did stuffs, but I felt even my little brother can do the stuffs I did. It's just not good enough sumtimes to see gd team mates doing all those codings and there you are
sitting beside them trying to help but u feel really helpess coz it's etiher u are too slow to catch up with wat they are saying or kookoo in codings! Sometimes in the declaration form, I just
wana put I did little stuffs for the team. Watever it is, standby for sure. I'm ready to take supp paper for Database and Adv Mob....
took up this course even I didnt't want to. Networking is my strongest area during ITE times but I didn't expect Info-Com to have many programming subjects sia. Haikzzz wat to do...I also didnt intent to further my studies at first but to join the SPF right after NS. My mum wants me to work but I insist changing my plan to study back instead of joining the Force.Haikzz now too late I guess. Just need to endure to complete this diploma. At this age, studying with a fast pace is really killing my brain slowly. I should take it on a part-time basis. Life macam biscuit already! The reason Im still continuing is I need to improve myself and those few friends of mine who is simply much older then me BUT graduated with flying wheel!( even colors also out of colors for them). They are the main pillars for me to endure this fucking feelings and to endure endure endure. Simple lah, if dey can do it, I can but sometimes I cant! To achieve results like
them makes me more low. For me as long there is programming subjects, my gpa will no way to reach even 3 pointer! How frustrating! Haikzzzzz....
I just killed these feelings by having my long run either at ECP or working out at the gym. Running makes my mind blank, just looking forward , thinking what I want to do in life. Yes, Ive
been running like 5km 6km at least, just to ease the frustrating and fucked feelings in me. Haikzzz I wonder how 3.1 going to be.... MP got no networking but fucking programming! How am I going to cope? Binaweh lah like this, I also dont even dare to imagine!I'm still down right now. I cant focus for the meantime. I hope I can do well during the exams.
rock KAPAK music .peaceful environment. cheering
up those who are down. BIGBIKES. sports.nightride.boardgames. sleep,sleep,sleep.
webdesigning.malay arts.
